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Sunday, February 27, 2005 

Lance Has Not Left the Building

So just glancing at the book’s cover my first thought was – Ok, Lance you dumped your wife, the one who was at your side through all those testicular cancer ridden chemo years so that you could gain a little celebrity time by bumping uglies with Sheryl Crow and now 50 million or more people are wearing those yellow rubber-band bracelets of yours like dysfunctional open-toed condoms on their wrists and you know? I’m a little amazed, a little dismayed and a lot a confused!

“But does anybody else see the irony in all this like I do?” - Patrick O’Neil

And in the long run just what have you really done that deserves me, or anyone else really, to be taking up our valuable free time reading your book? Sure, sure, the Tour de France thing and the massive amount of physical training it takes and the few times that I actually watched the damn thing on telly it looked like you guys were being a tad imperious and let’s not even mention the animosity of nationalism that was sprouting up everywhere like a certain rally at Nuremburg some 60 odd years earlier!

"Those who want to live, let them fight, and those who do not want to fight in this world of eternal struggle do not deserve to live." - Adolf Hitler

But come now! Do you really expect us all to believe that “written by Lance Armstrong” tag plastered on the cover of your book? Now really? So who’s this Shelly Jenkins woman? Some “friend” like Ms. Crow? Or is she really the one who wrote the darn thing after she picked your diluted brain for minor details – like quoting you when you said intelligent things like "I had to learn to be smart" or when you affectionately called your ex-wife a “real stud”.

"He was like a mathematician, with the calculator every day. It was crazy." -
Kristin Armstrong

Had I been actually able to read this book I think that I would still hold a bit of contempt for America’s newest fleeting hero; because as unintelligent as most jocks and athletes are Lance does nothing but reinforce these stereotypic perceptions, and in the end grubbing for our approval while boasting of heroic deeds it is but another example of the narcissistic tone of his degrading demeanor that a generation will hold dear as scared truths from a supposed noble source.

“The truth is, if you ask me to choose between winning the Tour de France and cancer, I would choose cancer. Odd as it sounds, I would rather have the title of cancer survivor than winner of the Tour, because of what it has done for me as a human being, a man, a husband, a son, and a father.” - Lance Armstrong

I think you forgot to mention being a multi-millionaire due to multi-national corporations and their lucrative sponsorships (Coca-Cola and Nike to name a few) - oh and Sheryl Crow’s stud muffin, eh Lance?

Alright so I hear everyone of you out there screaming because I’m not really being fair, and in reality what did our Lance do that was so bad? Doesn’t this capitalistic society of ours tell us to – go for it! And what is Lance doing but going for it? True. But do we all gotta buy into the unhealthiness of stardom? And what are the future Lance Armstrongs doing out there right now? Pedaling up and down those rural hills of America with their impressionable minds filled with hopes of unfathomable riches, a rock star girl friend and a nation of brainwashed individuals wearing rubber-bands inscribed with their names and singing their praises!

“All of a sudden, a figure moved up on my left. It was a woman in her 50s on a heavy mountain bike, and she went right by me.” - Lance Armstrong

Lance? You are so right it’s not about the bike! It’s about the all mighty dollar versus integrity and influencing others to do the same!

Please Lance – Leave the building already!



Guest Blogger: Fromage de Merde…

Fromage...

You are a stud muffin! I couldn't agree with you more. I just wish I was able to say it all as well as you do.

Bravo.

Excellent quote from Patrick O'Neil

But you didn't actually read the book? Just checking...

You have an interesting opinion of jocks...

"because as unintelligent as most jocks and athletes are Lance does nothing but reinforce these stereotypic perceptions"

Are you also reinforcing these stereotypic perceptions by saying that most jocks are unintelligent? I think people expect a lot from the jocks of this world. I am happy for someone to excel at something that is unfathomable to me (the whole being good at a sport by training and hurting and pushing on to be better and better). I don't also expect this person to be smart or compassionate or sensible or savvy or anything really.

Do you dislike all athlete/"authors" or is it just Lance in particular...because I'm not reading Dennis Rodman's or Shaq's book just to prove a point...life's too short, no?

First, nice job quoting O'Neil. ;)

Secondly, I love the format of this. The random quotes, the crazy reactions.

Third, You didn't even read the book????

Awesome post! I love the way you write. Thanks for being our guestblogger... VSoM hearts Fromage!

"Ok, Lance you dumped your wife, the one who was at your side through all those testicular cancer ridden chemo years..."

He didn't even meet his wife until all of his cancer treatments were done!

Your format and ideas are interesting, but there's not a whole lot of credibility going on if you didn't actually read the book...

You know, I have a hard time with my friends knowing the very worst about me...and I am obviously not in the public eye. When you're at the absolute LOWEST in your life, do you want "the public" to know the real you? I think Lance did a good job at "letting people in" while maintaining some of his private moments, if need be.

Take a look at the LIVESTRONG website...it sure does give so many people hope and a chance to tell their story.

Also, do I wish that teachers, etc(like our dear Kaycee) made as much money as Lance and other celebrities? You bet your ass I do. But I don't blame our society's appetite for celebrities and corporate sponsorship on Lance. Sure, he benefits from it...but he surely didn't invent it.

Thanks for guest blogging, Fromage...you rock.

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This Week's Topic:

  • The Sabbath Day

Various Authors

  • Monday:
    Kaycee opted out of Mormondom 4 years ago. She calls herself agnostic.
  • Tuesday:
    Sarah is not your average Gospel Doctrine Teacher.
  • Wednesday:
    Carrie Ann comes from pioneer stock, and lives in Provo, but is open minded and fair.
  • Thursday:
    Ned Flanders hasn't been to church in a while, but maintains an interest in all things Mormon.
  • Friday:
    John C. is an academic with a sense of humor and a testimony.
  • Saturday:
    JP's not going to church and feeling okay about it.

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