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Thursday, March 17, 2005 


Yep that's right people, I HATE DATING. Be it "Mormon Dating” Or what ever other type of dating there is. I actually have not dated too many non-Mormons. I must confess Mormon girls are pretty darn cute. So there is really no reason to stray to far from the flock.

I wanted to discuss my "dating packages". But since there are females that read this that have been on one of the packages I will not devulage to much info on my Date Package #1, #2, #3 or #4.
To the girls, they seen really fun and spontaneous but to me it was the effort of several years of planning and modifying. I made sure they went beyond the average "BYU Date". I really aimed to please. Of course most of my creativeness came through something to do at Sundance.

BBQ's hiking, riding the chairlift Mt Biking. So my dates really were not that original, they were just doing something I wanted to do.

I tried to avoid the typical Mormon date thing as much as possible. I did get sucked in one time. I had just returned from Brazil, and ready to go in life. One of my companions in Brazil had suggested that I take his sister out. "She's really cute, and really fun, and she is very funny. You two will get along so well".
If you have been to BYU you realize that as a freshman your life focuses around getting married. So of course, with no thought, or follow up questions I went. We were doubling with her brother. After arriving at her house, I realized I was to be in HELL for the rest of the evening. This came from the fact that in the first 15 minutes she said nothing to me.

We walked to the car, I was driving my 1981 Oldsmobile Omega, I called it the Omega Supreme the Dream Machine. The ladies just called it Dreamaga!(Just ask Becca, she has been in it before). A little background info: In my family we were encouraged to enjoy other aspects of life besides dating and girlfriend/boyfriend relationships till after we were out of high school. The only dating I did in high school was a few school dances. So this being one of my first official dates, I was a little rusty on the do's and don’ts of dating. Well apparently there is a do of opening the door when the girl gets in and out of the car, why? I am not sure; does she not know how to open the door? I guess not. So I got in started the car, and realized that she was still standing outside. So I waited, and waited. And finally got out of the car and let her in. Well by the end of the evening I was so annoyed with her, that I actually got up and walked away and left her in the car. She sat there for about 5 minutes and finally opened the door. Hooray for her, she finally figured out how to grab that little handle and pull. Of course I now know that the whole door thing is mandatory, (however I refuse to get out of the car and open the door so she can get out of the car.) Well the date ended, and I never heard from her again, and I really did not care. I had learned my lesson, BYU dating sucked, and for the next 5 years that was my attitude (and still is). Because lets face it in the Mormon culture, the date is nothing more then a job interview. The job of course is as provider, protector, husband, and father. Apparently I have not done so well in the interview. Showing up late to the interview, not dressed right for the interview. Finding out that that is not the “company” I want to work for early in the interview, etc. etc. etc. That’s how you become 32 and a single Mormon, bad interviews. Of course I have to say that most the interviewers are holding on to an ideal far beyond that which is real. And I just keep failing to find the right interviewer who has finally given up hope and has realized that the perfect candidate just aint out there.

So ya’ll have a great weekend, and go on a date and do something fun!

Give me a break. You get to be 32 and single because you're too picky.

You have to be picky. ;) It's your life we're talking about, and eternity for that matter with the mormons.

The day you finally meet a woman for whom you would be only too glad to hold the car door open will be the day you've met your mate.

I agree with Mrs Jane Doe...it'll be like the mom's story in Sleepless in Seattle...it'll be like..MAGIC.

By the way, are you picky, Cam??? ;)

I feel sorry for the girl. Did you warn her that you were going to intentionally violate cultural norms in a fashion normally reserved to inflict serious insult?

You basically told her that she did not make the cut and was headed for the trash heap in the immediate beginning of the date. Then you rubbed it in, letting her know that she was so far below the cut that she did not merit any common courtesy or cultural politeness.

No wonder she didn't talk to you.

I hope you aren't quite so maliciously cruel on a regular basis.

Magic is bullsh**

LOL...don't hold anything back, Anonymous.

And while I don't ACTUALLY believe in magic (was quoting the movie) there will be that moment when Cam will know that's he's found the right person for "the job" and the interview will be a success.

I have always wondered about the door thing too.

Okay, so at college, when my LDS friends are trying to get me to warm up to the idea of dating...(production style, with invitations such as..a blown out egg, with a note in it that said, "I will be eggstreamly, eggcited, if you would eggscort me to a fun filled eggstravaganza" *rolling eyes*) they planned the whole evening... which included the eggstreamly odd guy... who came over for a fancy pasta meal before the beloved eggawful dance..

Dinner on the stove was cooking when then the guys arrived, a big pot of water and pasta. I went to drain the pasta, and my room mate (the dating guru..) came clopping over, with an eggaserated eggspression and said, "Oh, that is just soo heavy.. maybe.. (what was his name, anyway) could lift that for you...

I spent the rest of the night wondering, if in the back of his mind he was seriously contemplating how on earth I got the pot there in the first place?????

*shaking my head*

Over time, I found a happy medium. Where I like the door to be opened for me, because it makes me feel ... adored and appreciated, but I have no problem getting it myself.

Someday, when you find that you actually want the job...you will do great in the interview Cameron. And you will probably reach the same conclusion.. its a LOT more about the act of service of getting the door, than the lack of ability .

Dreamaga!! What a joke. I have the worst memories of that car. And they deal with toothpaste in my face on the way to school.

Anonymous... Too Picky? There is no such thing when choosing someone you want to keep around for life.

In response to the 2nd comment...

Maybe Mrs. Right will be the girl who doesn't wait for anyone to open the door for her. :P

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This Week's Topic:

  • The Sabbath Day

Various Authors

  • Monday:
    Kaycee opted out of Mormondom 4 years ago. She calls herself agnostic.
  • Tuesday:
    Sarah is not your average Gospel Doctrine Teacher.
  • Wednesday:
    Carrie Ann comes from pioneer stock, and lives in Provo, but is open minded and fair.
  • Thursday:
    Ned Flanders hasn't been to church in a while, but maintains an interest in all things Mormon.
  • Friday:
    John C. is an academic with a sense of humor and a testimony.
  • Saturday:
    JP's not going to church and feeling okay about it.

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